Addiction Is a Family Illness — But So Is Recovery

By Carolin Pettersson, Recovery Coach & Founder of The Zenit Room

Addiction isn’t just something I studied — it’s something I’ve lived. I grew up in a home affected by alcoholism, spent years navigating codependent relationships, and eventually walked the long, humbling path of recovery myself. Today, I work with individuals and families across Europe who are facing the same struggles I once did, offering support, guidance, and a reminder: you are not alone.

Addiction: A Chronic Illness, Not a Character Flaw

Let’s be clear: addiction is not a lack of willpower or a moral failure. It’s a chronic, relapsing illness that changes how the brain works. Like diabetes or asthma, addiction requires understanding, management, and long-term support. When we begin to see it for what it truly is — a health issue — we can begin to let go of blame and guilt, and replace them with empathy, structure, and care.

As someone who’s spent decades observing the ripple effects of addiction, I’ve seen what happens when families keep trying to “fix” the person using, while completely neglecting themselves. I did this too. It doesn’t work — and it wears you down.

Families Hurt Too

Addiction affects everyone in the household. As a recovery coach, I meet with parents, partners, siblings — people who feel exhausted, confused, anxious, and sometimes ashamed. They’re trying to hold it all together while silently falling apart.

I hear things like:

• “How can I help them without losing myself?”

• “Is it wrong to take a step back?”

• “I feel like I’m the one going crazy — but I’m not even the addict.”

These are familiar words. I’ve spoken them myself. The truth is, family members often become emotionally and physically unwell too. And yet, their pain is overlooked. That’s why I say: recovery must include the whole family.

What Family Recovery Looks Like

Healing doesn’t begin the day your loved one goes to treatment — it begins the day you start to heal. In my coaching sessions and family programmes, we work on things like:

• Setting healthy boundaries

• Understanding the nature of addiction

• Managing anxiety and over-responsibility

• Building emotional resilience

• Developing a personal self-care plan

• Rebuilding trust (slowly, gently)

• Letting go of control — while still staying connected

When families recover, the entire system has a chance to change. You can learn to live with more clarity, confidence, and peace — no matter what your loved one chooses.

The Zenit Room and a Message of Hope

That’s why I founded The Zenit Room — to offer compassionate, experienced support to those affected by addiction, especially the often-overlooked loved ones. I work privately with clients and also collaborate with residential treatment centres across Europe, such as Smarmore Castle in Ireland, where I deliver family programmes grounded in evidence, empathy, and lived experience.

Whether you’re just beginning to realise how deeply addiction has affected your life, or you’ve been carrying this burden for years, know this: you are allowed to heal, too. You are allowed to get help, to let go of shame, and to step into a life that feels more peaceful and authentic.

A Final Word

If you're reading this and feeling broken, I want you to hear something I say to almost every family I work with: You didn’t cause this, you can’t control it, and you can’t cure it — but you can choose to heal.

Recovery is a journey, not a destination. And you don’t have to walk it alone.

With warmth and understanding, Carolin Pettersson

Recovery Coach & Founder, The Zenit Room